An Apology and the Need to Say No

An Apology and the Need to Say No An Apology My sincerest apologies to the folks who attended our Washington, DC, event last month: it was the first show Ive missed in the seven years weve been touring as The Minimalists. On the day of that event, I was suffering from the effects of a nasty virusâ€"likely contracted from my child or caught while dishing out hundreds of free hugsâ€"and I had to get an emergency IV drip. There was no way I couldve made it to the theater that night, let alone the main stage, but thankfully Ryan and the rest of the team held down the fort in my absence. After being bedridden with a wicked fever for two days, I mustered what little strength I could to make it to our subsequent events in Atlanta and Tampa, albeit in a diminished capacity. Although my health has been improving slowly since those events, Ive still been feeling ill the past three weeks, and this illness has taught me a lot about pushing past my limits. The Need to Say No I often find comfort in my discomfort zoneâ€"that’s the place from which we grow. But when I stretch too far, my health suffers, and the result isnt good for anyoneâ€"my audience, my family, my friends, and I all suffer. The last three weeks have given me time to scrutinize my grueling schedule, and I realized something unfortunate: over the past year, my life has gradually become busy. Ugh! There isnt a more vulgar four-letter word in the English language. Of course, it didnt happen overnight. In fact, I’ve been good at avoiding busyness since I left the corporate world seven years ago. But every time I say yes to something, Im indirectly saying no to something else. And this year is the first time since my corporate days Ive said yes too much. Within the last twelve months, we released our documentary on Netflix, started working on two new film projects, moved our families to Los Angeles, began building a podcast and film studio, produced our first physical good, wrote dozens of essays, recorded more than 60 podcast episodes, interviewed with more than 100 media outlets, and embarked on a 50-city international tour. On their own, these are all worthwhile endeavors. But crammed into one year, its too muchâ€"especially considering Ive been dealing with C. Diff, mercury poisoning, multiple chemical sensitivities, and daily physical therapy for my back. Im simply not as durable as I like to pretend. You see, sometimes when I say yes to something thats seemingly important, Im inadvertently saying no  to something else thats even more important: health, relationships, creativity. Which means that, going forward, I must do a better job saying no to anything that isn’t a true priorityâ€"even the good stuff. So Im scaling back in the following ways. Fewer projects. Im saying yes to only one major project at a time. The next project well be working on as The Minimalists is a new film thats one part documentary, one part TED Talk, and one part stand-up special. All other new projects will simmer on the back burner until this one is complete. Back to basics. The creative work that fuels me the most is writing and podcasting. So, in the vein of fewer projects, these creative outletsâ€"mixed with our new film projectâ€"will receive the bulk of my attention in 2018. I think of this trio of creativity as a three-legged table: each leg is a necessary part of our creative output, and they each play an equal role in helping us communicate with our audience effectively. The table is sturdy with three legsâ€"adding more seems superfluous. Reduced social media. As an experiment, we will spend January away from social media. We’re confident it will help us determine how to better use these platforms going forward. I’ll definitely write an essay about the experience once it’s over. Less growth. Through a combination of luck and hard work, weve been fortunate to reach a large audience with our work, but Im no longer interested in scaling up. Sure, I want our message to reach as many eyes and ears as possible, but I believe the best way to do this isnt via the traditional tropes of content generation; rather, I want to focus on meaningful creations, without worrying about what will resonate or go viralâ€"and certainly without endlessly promoting our brand. Promoless. I listen to a lot of podcasts, I see a lot of billboards, and I even notice it encroaching upon my own work: theres too much branding going on these days. No, there arent any advertisements on our website or podcast, but even I am guilty of too much self-promotion that gets in the way of my own creations. Perhaps Derek Sivers said it best: putting ads in your work is like putting a Coke machine in a monastery. Im beginning to feel the same about all the shameless self-promotion thats going on these days, including my own. Tweets and photos and status updates. Its solipsism run amuck. And Im pledging to remove the Coke machine from the monastery immediately so you can better enjoy what Im creating without the promotional eyesores. Yes, Ill occasionally talk about what Im working onâ€"including events, books, and projectsâ€"but I wont let it get in the way of what Im creating. If anything, promotion should be similar to the end credits of a film, not the main plot. Fewer interviews. From every major newspaper, radio program, and TV show to the tiniest podcasts, Ryan and I have probably accepted a thousand interviews over the last half-decade, and Ive said everything I need to say to the media. So, unless youre Joe Rogan, dont be surprised if I say no to your interview request next year. Dont worry, its not youâ€"its me. As a policy, I have to say no, so I can say yes to my life. Fewer events. Our Less Is Now tour is finally coming to an end, and truth be told, touring is probably the straw that broke my back this year. It pains me to say this because I absolutely love our live events. But nonstop touring is challenging. Thankfully, theres a light at the end of the tunnel. This weekend Ryan I will end our year with just two stops in Detroit and Milwaukee. Then, in January, we have only one charity event in Las Vegas (profits go to the Las Vegas Victims Fund). Finally, in March 2018, after a two-month break, were going to Australia and New Zealand to end the tour. And then we’re finished for a while. Yes, were honoring these commitments, and Im truly excited to see you on the road, but then were saying no to new events for a while because 50 events in one year is too much. Too much for me, at least (Ryan is far more durable than I am). So, after a long break next year, well determine whats appropriate going forward. Whatever the number is, itll be considera bly less than our current pace. Right now, Im thinking maybe a couple live events per quarterâ€"maybe fewer, maybe none. Well see. Less travel. Ive been on nearly a hundred flights this year, which is taxing on my body. By doing fewer tour stops and fewer speaking gigs next year, Ill reduce the majority of my travel, but the cold truth is I dont enjoy traveling. I have peripatetic friends who live for driving to the next city, flying to the next country, visiting as many new places as possible. That aint me. I dont like flights or long car rides, and its difficult for me to sleep on the road. So I plan on reducing my globetrotting by 80% next year, which, paradoxically, might help me enjoy my limited travels a bit more. Subscribe to The Minimalists via email.